Some golden nuggets - worth buying
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If you've studied a reasonable amount of NLP and body language before you'll probably find this book covers too much old ground without really going in to detail - for example the chapter on body language offers you nothing other than stating obvious facts such as a person's facial expressions can give you clues to what they're really thinking.
That said this book is very helpful in improving communication with others. Even if you've studied body language and NLP there's still information that's new with a fresh angle that I have never heard of before. In particular how we unintentionally present blocks to people and how to encourage responses from others. I've started implementing the few golden nuggets and have noticed some tangible results.
My recommendation is skip over the common knowledge background and extract the essense of the new material. Overall it's definately worth buying even if you're a reasonale practicioner - it could just be distilled better.
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Reader new to the subject
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Avoiding communication barriers, understanding different techniques of reflection and when to use them. How to be more assertive in ways that respect others and keep me healthy. I think I am very lucky to have found this book. It is improving the quality of my relationships and so changing my life.
I would like to find a video to present in groups I attend that would spark some interest in the comm skills described in this book. I so much want to open others' minds to what the book has to say.
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The best book on communication &reflective listening barnone
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I regularly coach groups on interpersonal communication and have to admit that this book, for me, was a real gem of a find. I have read many books on interpersonal communication ... and have generally been disappointed on the coverage of reflective listening and communication barriers ... Bolton's book ... was simple, easy to understand, easy to learn and follow ... and yet dealt with fundamental communication skills that you generally only see expert coaches or counsellors use. Wonderful!
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YOU MUST READ THIS BOOK
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This book is simple to understand, truthful and full of good communication skills. I have read many books on dealing with people but this is the best. If the Bible is THE book for the religous then this is the Bible for people who seek better relationships. You will never regret this purchase!
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Essential for the non-assertive!
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Bolton's book has many things which interested me, but particularly important was his formula for three part assertion messages. I found this good to use in situations where I needed to be assertive - but in the past had not been. In framing the messages I was able to detect and weed out the (unhelpful) influences of my parents. As a parent I found it very useful in establishing good communications with my children.
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