What is right for me? and Where am I willing to be led? are the two essential questions -- Discernment requires that we ask these two questions continually and devotedly.

As Levoy says, 'people won't pursue their callings until the fear of doing so is finally exceeded by the pain of not doing so.' I have found this to be very true. It took a very long time to discern my call to the priesthood, and yet more time to decide that it is something I must do at all costs (and the costs have been heavy). Yet, I cannot imagine myself doing anything differently and being in any way fulfilled.

'The truest calls seem not only to keep coming back but also to make their way to us through many channels.'

Levoy integrates so much material here, from spiritual masters and the scriptural traditions of many religious faiths to modern psychology and artistic/cultural experts.

Perhaps the greatest chapter for me was that on 'Finding Clarity', in which Levoy says that 'there is such a thing as thinking too much about a calling.' As Emerson said, sometimes it is best to let the bird sing without trying to decipher the song. 'A calling is ultimately mysterious, and the process of discernment is always a bit of a guessing game.'

Levoy's guidance, in cooperation with others in my community, helped me to see a change of mindset, a change of events, a change of personalities were all converging to tell me something that I had closed my mind to, or, more accurately, had closed my heart to. So, I began to pray, even if only subconsciously, and the path began to materialise before my eyes.

'When I pray, coincidences start to happen. When I don't pray, they don't happen.' - William Temple

It also taught me that I couldn't wait for 'someday' -- how we spend our days is how we spend our lives, according to the apt observation of Annie Dillard.

And finally, it made me face what it was to keep saying no. There is a cost, and eventually God will get you anyway -- Jonah (remember Jonah and the great fish?) said no, but eventually had follow his call anyway. I learned that one source of my fear: 'One of the frightening prospects of saying yes to a calling is that you may find out who really supports you and who doesn't.'

Figuring out how to bring my call into being was the final task, and Levoy provided wisdom here as well. 'You cannot cross a chasm in two small jumps', he quoted Lloyd-George as saying; I was forced to create a response to my call, one that did not exist before.

Thus, not too long after discovering this book, I became Father Kurt, and I owe much to this book for that. But please, don't assume that it will tempt or trap you into a ministerial role--it is an excellent guide for discernment, and discernment is one of the most personal tasks for any human being. Prepare to be enlightened.