not funny
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This attemtpts to be as funny as The Timewaster Letters. Quite simply, it is not.
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A WORTHY SUCCESSOR TO HENRY ROOT
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Taking on the authorities of your local or far distant golf club is a worthy pursuit for any man of letters and Dom Joly has written more than most! Dwarf tossing and gangsta rap may not figure in the majority of member`s complaints to the greens committee, but who are we to sniff at these fanciful exploits which would enliven some of the most conservative institutions in the land?
Mick Drake author of the comic novel All`s Well at Wellwithoute.
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Eye-Wateringly Funny
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I'm not sure what book one of the reviewers has been reading, as there was no mention of a VW Beetle in the one I read! That aside, reading this book was the best laugh I've had in ages. The scenarios he describes to the various Golf Clubs he contacts are sometimes so ludicrous that you think he can't possibly get away with it, but somehow, he does. Not always, but enough of those Dom Joly contacted did get back to him, and thank goodness for that or this book might never have been written. Interestingly, he says that the Scots were the most accommodating in investigating his wild accusations, and the English the least. I'm not sure what that tells us - unless dwarf-tossing on the golf course is a more common sight up north, who knows?? Highly recommended as a quick cheerer-upper, or an excellent stocking-filler for Christmas. *****
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Don't bother
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Not sure what book the others were reading. This is a very poor effort clearly churned out to meet some sort of contractual obligation. Each letter is basically the same joke and most of the letters didn't even get a response. Save your money and watch his TV show or buy Timewasters Letters instead.
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Very funny
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Dom Joly has an impressive list of achievements behind him, dating back to his early childhood in Lebanon. Few other comedians can lay a claim at having been schooled alongside Osama Bin Laden (aside from Peter Kay and Joe Pasquale), but Joly can go one better still- he stole Bin Laden's lunch money on a daily basis! Dr Raj Persaud has even claimed that Joly's shower-room gibes may have triggered (the diminutive) Bin Laden's persecution complex. However, Persaud stopped short of denouncing the comedian's behaviour as a factor in the provokation of terrorist atrocities (after Joly gave him a really vicious Chinese burn and shoved him into a patch of nettles). In any case, such theories have been discredited by the revelation that Osama Bin Laden (one of Joly's three million+ Facebook friends) recently hugged the entertainer using 'Superpoke', before going on to present him with keg of virtual beer.
Anyhow, it is a little known fact that (when he is not busy filming 'in da Bungalow') Dom is a keen German automobile enthusiast who has been President of the Volkswagen Golf Club since 2001. Joly says that it was a difficult decision to accept the post- after he realised that the secret ordination ceremony would clash with the London premiere of 'Tomb Raider'. However, the decision paid off and only three years later he achieved reconciliation with his daughter, actress Angelina. This hilarious volume features letters that have been sent to him by real-life idiots, throughout his years at the club.
Here is a sample:
(QUOTE)
Dear Mr Joly,
I own a 2005 three door Volkswagen Golf R32 DSG, type 4/5S HBK. Here are the engine specs:
Manufacturer: cast iron block; aluminium head
Type: 6-V
Wet sumped
DOHC
4 valves per cylinder
Main bearings: 7
Bore x stroke: 84.00 mm. Ã 95.90 mm.
Bore / stroke ratio: 0.88
Displacement: 3189 cc 194.60 cu in
Compression: 10.9
Fuel system: MPFi
Aspiration: Normal
Catalytic Converter: Y
Max. output: 250.4 PS (247 bph) (184.1 kW) @ 6300 rpm
Max. torque: 320 Nm (236 lbft) (32.6 kgm) @ 2500 rpm
Coolant: Water
and here are the performance specs:
0-50mph (80 km/h): 4.3 s
0-100km/h: 6.2 s
Quarter mile: 14.5 s
Kilometre: 26.7 s
Top speed: 248
Fuel consumption: 13.1/7.7/9.7 l/100km urban/extra-urban/combined
CO2 emissions: 233 g/km
Yesterday the wife and I took our car out to the reservoir, where we met with some like-minded couples for an evening of wine and leisure. Unfortunately, after a few drinks caused things to heat up, the seats became heavily soiled. Despite our efforts, conventional stain removal techniques have failed to lift the residue from the upholstery. We have been thinking about taking the car back to the garage, as it is under three months old. However, my wife is concerned that having invited strangers to perform a round of 'bukkake' in the back constitutes a breach of terms and conditions that may invalidate the warranty. Furthermore, she fears that the garage would be legally obliged to pass on the results of their inspection to the secret police. Any help would be most appreciated.
Yours Sincerely,
Colonel Messington-Fortescue
(END QUOTE)
I quite literally laughed when I saw that he attributed a bore/stroke ratio of 0.88. Even my wife Doreen knows that it should be 0.87- and she's a woman!
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