Great Guidebook
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A lot has been said already about this book over the years since it first hit the shelves, and I'm not sure I can offer any new information. I believe everybody should either read this book or books like it. We all need a greater understanding; not just of others (our partners, family and friends), but also of ourselves.
The more compatible a couple naturally is the better they will get on. That's just logical. But sometimes we need to be aware of, and reminded of, the differences between men and women so they ae are more tolerant and understanding; particularly during rough patches of life.
Dr. John Gray offers a great insight into these differences and tackles the subject matter in an informative, but at the same time, light-hearted and fun manner. I enjoyed this book. Some of the information I already knew, but there were definitely new insights I learner and understood better regarding men and women. I regularly find myself refering to this text to remind myself of these differences, and to remember to be more tolerant and understanding.
How To Keep Your Man: And Keep Him For Good
Real Life Dramas - Volume One: 1
Darren G. Burton
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Words of Wisdom
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This book probably won't seem terribly relevant if you are in the first flush of romance. But if you hope to be in a relationship for the long haul, then this is the book for you. It changed my marriage immesurably for the better and throws light on how to communicate what you want effectively and without becoming angry or defensive. John Gray hits the nail on the head so many times, my husband and I learned a huge amount about what makes us tick and why we behave the way we do. While this was written before scientific research confirmed the differences between male and female brains, work done since has backed up Dr Gray's theories and he has written a number of more up to date volumes since. A little repetitive toards the end but Highly Recommended, none the less.
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A lot of good information
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I agree with many of the previous reviews that the differences Gray has observed in men and women are contained in the first few chapters and the rest of the book goes on to illustrate these. I also agree that the book makes sweeping statements and assumptions about gender behaviour and ways men and women think. It also assumes that all men are broadly the same, and that likewise all women are also broadly the same, which is clearly not the case.
However, unlike virtually anything else written on the subject anywhere, the book is actually based upon genuine empirical research undertaken by Gray (despite his dubious PhD qualification) into the way real people behave, and so has a great deal of value. There are also many second-rate `copy-cat' publications out there which say the same kind of things, but I think this is the best book on the subject. I personally believe that both men and women display much of the behaviours described here and so we can all learn how to relate better with each other.
Although sound research on the subject is almost totally lacking, I personally believe that 90+% of the differences described are due to external factors and social conditioning, and are not genetic. The key thing here is to make use of the suggestions and solutions provided, and improve the way we behave to our nearest and dearest and reap the benefits!
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Good, but...
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I really enjoyed the first couple of chapters; they were well-written, informative and really quite interesting. Unfortunately, the rest of the book regurgitates the same information, making for a dull read. Still, I'd recommend this book (if you can get it for a good price) if only for the first couple of chapters.
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So generalised to be totally inaccurate and completely unhelpful
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I read this book when I was on holiday with relatives and bored, and found it useless. This book attempts to pigeonhole men and women by assigning them characteristics. Yes, I've known women who've ranted at someone about a problem and taken umbrage when a solution has been offered, but I've known men who've done the same. And I've known rude men who will demand "Make me an egg for breakfast!" and likewise rude women, to quote two examples from the book. This book attempts to attribute character flaws, such as rudeness, vagueness, disagreeableness, to gender and does not take into account any individuality of the concerned parties. Assuming the information in the book is correct and acting on the instructions offered could very likely damage a relationship. If people want to improve their communication with their partners, I suggest they talk to them and find out more about them, or at least use a scientifically accredited psychological theory with individual application such as the Myers-Briggs personality type indicator.
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